


When You Call My Name

by MajorWinchesterFan, stateofintegrity



Category: MASH (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-15
Updated: 2020-10-15
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:56:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 951
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27031540
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MajorWinchesterFan/pseuds/MajorWinchesterFan, https://archiveofourown.org/users/stateofintegrity/pseuds/stateofintegrity
Summary: Klinger really wishes Major Winchester would stop using his name.
Relationships: B. J. Hunnicutt/Benjamin Franklin "Hawkeye" Pierce, Maxwell Klinger/Charles Emerson Winchester III
Comments: 6
Kudos: 17





	When You Call My Name

Shaking in a pair of very pretty shoes, Maxwell Q. Klinger went to the camp’s ringleaders for help. “Please make him stop.”

They didn’t have to ask what he was referring to; they’d seen their fellow surgeon call for the Corporal only to have the Corporal turn rose-white, then rose-pink. They’d thought it part of the whole section eight-scapade at first, Klinger’s very visceral reaction, but it seemed there was more to it than that. 

Working on a letter home, BJ offered, “Ask him to call you by your rank. You can’t get in trouble for that.” 

Hawkeye voted for more familiarity, still. “Start calling him Charles.” 

Klinger whipped his head back and forth. “Can’t. He’d  _ hear _ .”

Hawk smirked so hard it hurt his cheeks. “Take a cold shower, Klinger. You’ll get over him.” He still couldn’t believe it - that the pretty kid Corporal had eyes for Charles but not for him. Hawk didn’t want Klinger, but he had a reputation to uphold. 

“I can't help it captain. I respond to the sound of Charles' voice like Pavlov's dog to a bell.” He waited a beat, admitted, “Major Freedman taught me that one.”

“You start to drool?” Hawkeye volleyed back. 

Giddy with being permitted to talk about the love of his life without fear or censure, Klinger slid right into pure rhapsody. “Captain, my Captain, if you only knew the things I drool over when it comes to Charles!”

BJ laughed; Klinger was always a good show. “Now you’re spouting poetry? Next thing you know, Hawk, he'll be playing the French horn.” 

Klinger batted lashes that were as long and lovely as the gal he sometimes was. “No worries there sirs. I've got bigger and better things to blow! I hope, anyway."

“Klinger!!” BJ wasn’t really scandalized; Hawk was halfway proud. 

Klinger looked both innocent and wondering. “What? Am I wrong?” (He really wanted to know, too. The doctors did their own physicals, naturally - these two were his best chance of finding out via testimony). 

BJ gave Hawk a look intended to rein him in. “Don’t you dare.” 

Annoyed at being rerouted from the lascivious, at which he excelled, Pierce asked, instead,“Why don’t you tell him about your feelings, Klinger?”

Klinger held up two fingers. “Two reasons - I don’t want to die here. And I’ve worked really hard to be his friend. Pretty sure he won’t be if I tell him, umm,  _ that _ .” 

BJ didn’t mind dipping his toes in the lascivious now and then. The 4077th was a dull place to be sometimes. “‘That’ being the fact that you want to climb him like a tree?” 

Klinger looked annoyed at that. “He’d pick me up, don’t you think? He’s a gentleman.” 

Hawk waggled his eyebrows at him. “Thought about it, huh?” 

“As often as I can.” 

“How do you have time?” BJ asked, thinking of the many, many jobs Klinger rotated through. 

“I can multitask.”

Hawkeye just chose to tease him. “No wonder the paperwork’s a mess - you’re too busy writing Mrs. C. E, Winchester in the margins.”

Klinger perked up, looked a little alarmed. “There isn’t one yet, right? I mean, unless you guys know something?” He adored Charles, but a married person would have been out of bounds. An engaged Charles… he wondered if he had a mourning frock somewhere. 

“No mentions,” BJ assured him. “But, Klinger, don’t you think it's a hard match?”

“Uh, sirs, you don’t make sense on paper either,” he pointed out. He’d gotten away with talking about Charles in all his (imagined - but he thought his imagination was right) length and girthiness - he could dare this. 

BJ blushed, but Hawk countered, “More sense than Boston-Toledo. Especially when it’s upper class, landed gentry Boston.”

A fourth voice joined their informal debate. “Oh, I don’t know. Are opposites not held to make good sparks?” 

Klinger flashed the two Captains a look that should have been captioned “Help, I’m dead.” 

“You’re okay with this?” Pierce would have immediately agreed that this wasn’t his best line, but stalling was stalling. If they could get Charles out of the doorway, Klinger could make a break for it. He’d kept well ahead of the other man after the World Series debacle for weeks. He glanced at the kid’s shoes. Not sensible… but maybe he could kick them off? 

“I okayed the Hunnicutt-Pierce-Hunnicutt alliance if you recall, even unto donating my tape recorder that there might be no misunderstandings from mere print.” 

BJ blushed again. Did  _ everybody _ know?!? 

Klinger inched closer to Hawkeye. “Not to interrupt, but you know to bury me in blue, huh? And definitely not my uniform?” 

“Don’t kill him, Charles. He’s useful and doesn’t take up much space. And there’s your oath to think about.” 

“I have no murderous intentions toward our Corporal. Come along, Max.” The Captains heard it, then. The drawn out “a’s”, softened enough to suggest someone panting, “ah, ah.” Hawk hoped it got to be Klinger. 

“Good luck, kid.”

Klinger’s shoulders slumped like he was headed for his own execution - but he went. 

“Where are we going, sir?”

“To see if I can get you to say  _ my _ name. Whatever did you imagine this campaign was for, my dear?” 

Max stopped, stunned, thrilled. “Can I say the whole thing? With maybe some other stuff around it?”  _ Stuff like “will you be mine forever, pretty please, Major, baby, sir?” _

“If you will hear your name spoken, entire, in turn. Say with a witness or two? I do wish to keep you, Maxwell. Haven’t you heard?”

Thinking of that voice, Max realized that he had been hearing it all along. Now, slipping his hand into a larger one, he got to believe. 

End!

  
  
  
  
  



End file.
